What's in that little head of yours?

When I was younger, I used to have a dog, and something that was always on my mind was what they were thinking. Actually, it wasn't so much "what" they were thinking, because I'm sure it was along the lines of food, play, hump things, but it was more of "how" they thought. Do dogs think in dog language, so in their head they hear "bark bark bark" and "woof woof woof", or do they think in people terms like "I sure could use a bone right now" and "I bet that stuffed animal over there will satisfy me?" Well in the Simpsons, Santa's Little Helper could hear random words intermingled with sounds like those you hear from adults in Charlie Brown. "Wah wah wah wah roll over wah wah wah" instead of "Hey boy, please roll over for me".

And then, around the same time, I was also big into The Rugrats. You ever watch that show? It was about babies who talked like normal to other babies, but sounded like they were crying or babbling to adults. I'm still convinced that babies talk to each other through their crying, but it's not nearly as comprehensible as it seemed on Rugrats.

So, you're probably wondering how dogs and The Rugrats tie into whatever is in my head. But it's simple (to me). What goes on inside Kaylani's little head? When I tell her to open her eyes, or to go to sleep, to stay still, or to smile for the camera, does that actually filter through her head and she ignores me, or do I sound like "wah wah wah wah?" Also, when she's laying there looking back at me, is she thinking "Hi Daddy! Aren't I really cute? I like it when you stare at me and smile" or is she thinking "wahhhh wahhhh goo goo ga ga plbbbbt?" I really don't know!

The more I look at her and see her concentrating on me, or what I'm doing, the more I convince myself that she actually does process complete, comprehensible thoughts in her head, but she just doesn't know how to say them. It's like the last episode of Grey's Anatomy with the women who has lost her voice and is afraid to speak. Except with Kaylani, I think she could speak if she wanted to, but she's just holding out.

Well whenever it happens, I'll be ready for it. But if I know girls (and I think I do), once she starts talking, I may never get her to stop. And hopefully, by the time she's a teenager and on the phone all the time, phones won't exist and there will be alternate means of communication. Yikes, let's not go down that path tonight. It's wayyy too early to think teenage years! My fears on that will come up in a later post. For now though, it's time to pay attention to my baby girl while she is still one.

And for you out there, you can pay attention to my baby too. Come visit like my friend Neha did tonight and you can pay extra close attention to her. Otherwise, just check out these pictures from the last 2 days. It's not even close to the same thing, but you'll have to visit to find out just how different it is.

D is for Disgusting!

Fact: Kids don't like vitamins. It's taken 2 weeks, but I will now officially confirm this fact for Kaylani. Apparently she's just like all the other kids...I mean babies. She's not old enough to be a kid yet. In fact, she'll always be my baby, so forget the kids part in general and let's start over. Fact: Babies don't like vitamins.

Because Kaylani is breastfeeding and it's cold and gloomy here in the Northeast, our pediatrician recommended that we give Kaylani Vitamin D. She even recommended that we buy Tri-Vi-Sol instead of Poly-Vi-Sol because it tastes better. Little did we know how much our pediatrician actually knew.

To be fair, Mommy tried it before we gave it to Kaylani, and she said it tasted disgusting, but hey, that's all the happened to have at Target the day we were there. Well, we've been giving it to her for 3 weeks now, and we've finally caved in. Vitamin D is disgusting, at least in the Poly-Vi-Sol form. I can just see Kaylani shaking her head at me, rolling her eyes, and thinking to herself "THAT'S what I've been trying to tell you!"

Apparently we didn't pick up on this tell all too well. We now know that gagging, spitting up, crying, and practically choking are all signs that whatever she just ate tasted like crap. She even thought if she spit up on her once white onesies and staining them would teach us a lesson. It did...just 3 weeks too late. So, as a public apology to Kaylani, Daddy's sorry that he made you take Vitamin D-isgusting every night for 3 weeks, and he promises that Mommy or Daddy will go out and by the Tri-Vi-Sol that supposedly tastes much better.

We're also hoping that changing to a better tasting vitamin will stop other things too, like crying for no reason, not sleeping, diaper blowouts, and just general fussiness. Anyways, while we test out that theory, check out pictures from Kaylani's 1 month birthday! Maybe by her second birthday the effects of Vitamin D-isgusting will have worn off and she'll be calm, quiet, and sleeping through the night. Hey, you never know!

The Birth Story of Kaylani Isabel Tam

Since today is Kaylani's 1 month birthday, I'm going to post Kaylani's birth story, written by our doula, Stella Nieves. We found Stella through a combination of a web search and a recommendation from our midwife, and knew she was the right person for us once we met her. Not only was she personable and friendly, but she also spoke fluent Spanish (being from Columbia). That was pretty important to me since I was convinced that 1 of 2 things was going to happen: either Brendalys was going to switch to Spanish mid-labor and I wouldn't know what she was saying (I read that it happens!), or she was going to constantly curse at me in Spanish and I wanted to make sure that I knew what she was calling me (neither happened). And as an added plus, Stella's also a licensed massage therapist at Hillsborough Massage. If you live in the area, I highly recommend a visit. Brendalys has gone 3 times and I've even gone once, and it was the best 90 minute nap I've ever taken!

Stella was great during the whole thing and gave us the support and love that we needed during the labor. She came to the hospital quickly, and at the perfect time since Brendalys was starting to waver on her pre-labor "no meds" feeling. But with her help, we got through the labor as natural as can be in a hospital, and I know I've said this a thousand times, but it was an amazing experience.

I thank God and my wife everyday for my beautiful daughter, and I thank all of you for allowing me to share our lives with you. Click here to read The Birth Story of Kaylani Isabel Tam.

Excuse me Daddy, but there's a doody in my tub

Back in the summer of 2001, I worked at Roseland Waterpark in Canandaigua, NY. I managed the Admissions department (and also doubled as resident computer geek/DBA). One of my most vivid memories was the day we got our first "Code Brown" in the wave pool. Apparently there was a floating piece of poop in the wave pool, which caused us to shut it down and chlorinate the heck out of it. That, of course, led to several angry customers coming back to the Admissions department demanding their money back. My favorite was "Sir, your pool is infected with e-coli. I would never go in there again. Now, I would like a free season pass please." Sometimes I miss being in customer service. Most times, I do not.

Tonight, 7.5 years later, I experienced deja vu, except this time, no one complained except me. Well, no one verbally complained. To Kaylani's credit, she did attempt to warn Mommy and Daddy by crying during bath time (which is unusual since she does tend to enjoy it), but we thought it might have been due to the fact that she was awaken from her 3 hour nap with a bath instead of nursing.

Oddly enough, during bath time, I actually thought that it was pretty amazing that this was her fourth bath with us and we had yet to experience a "Code Brown" or even a "Code Yellow." Mommy was quick to point out that we would never even know if we had a "Code Yellow", but either way, this was definitely our first "Code Brown" in the tub. Luckily for us, we had yet to clean the responsible area, and we had just dumped the water to do so, so she was not subjected to sitting in her own filth for long. All in all, I'd say there was minimum exposure and that the containment team handled the situation quite well.

But the question that now lingers in my head is, what would we have done if that happened at the beginning of bath time? Do we have to sterilize the tub real well, or can we dump the water, wipe up the residue, and keep plugging along? Is the Head-t0-Toe wash strong enough to overpower the lasting effects of poop? As with all Johnson's Baby products, it does claim to be "gentle and mild", two characteristics that don't sound like they have a chance against floating doody.

And unlike the Wave Pool incident, Kaylani's poop isn't exactly solid. Actually, the only way I would use "solid" in the description of her poop is if I added "opposite of" in front of it. Well all I know is that tonight's bath finished in Mommy and Daddy's arms under the faucet, and that seemed just fine. But if this happens again a bit earlier, I guess I'll have to decide if I should light the bath on fire to disinfect it before I continue, or perhaps just throw it out and bathe her in a bucket.

Anyways, today did not go off according to our initial plan (shocking!), so I don't have any Christmas pictures for you yet. However, I do have some pictures from the last 3 days to share, and Mommy and Daddy are planning on starting the tree tonight so we can take pictures tomorrow with Kaylani. And now, I'm going to see if Kaylani will go to sleep a bit early so that Mommy and Daddy can work on the tree before our normal 10pm bedtime. Wish me luck, and if you've got any advice on how to handle "Code Brown", let me know!

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

I'm not sure what is scarier: the fact that Kaylani is 4 weeks old today, or that Christmas is less than 3 weeks away. With time at a premium nowadays, we took advantage of the weekend and headed out to get some key Christmas activities out of the way. This being our first year in our own house in the Northeast, there were a few necessities we had to buy before we could pick up our tree. So a trip to Lowe's for a tree stand and some lights and basic ornaments (great sale going on right now!), followed by a lunch break for all of us at Houlihan's (very kid friendly!), and then it was on to the tree yard.

We picked a short, fat tree that reminded Mommy of Daddy (her words), tied it to the roof, and we were off. While we were at it, we also picked up a ring of firewood (~100 pieces) because Christmas isn't officially Christmas unless you've got a fire going (also helps to keep non-Santa people from coming down the chimney). So now, the tree is up, the fire is ready to go, and the lights/ornaments are sitting in a bag next to the tree (hey, you can only get so much done with a baby around).

Actually, the reason we're not officially ready for Christmas is that we had our first holiday party tonight. It was at our friend's house and we were a little nervous to take Kaylani to her first party EVER! I mean, it was definitely kid friendly (there were about 7 kids, rhe youngest of them being 15 months), but still, we weren't sure how Kaylani would behave. But like every other adventure we've had, she did great!

And like every other adventure we've had, we also had a poop related incident. We thought we'd be safe since it was at a home less than 10 minutes away, but we had a little miscalculation. Apparently we were in a bit of a rush since we didn't refill the diaper bag after our afternoon errands. We had 3 diapers, which for 3 hours, is normally plenty. But what started as an easy pee change turned into a "three-fer" when pee turned to poo, and poo, turned into more poo. In case you didn't notice, the "public blowout" tracker in the upper right has been increased to 4.

Kaylani had finished eating, pooping, pooping, and eating (in that order) and we were ready to go back to the party. All seemed well, but we were out of diapers. We were essentially flying without a net, and if she decided she wasn't done, well then we would have been. She ended up not going again until we got home, and she was great. She was passed around from person to person so that they could get their "newborn fix" out of their system, and she stayed her cute little self for each one of them. I actually would not be surprised if there was a mini "baby boom" 9 months from now!

So it's been a long, eventful day, and all 3 of us are ready to call it a night. The original plan was to finish decorating the tree tonight, but it ain't gonna happen. It's time for this one to get some sleep, and that one to stay asleep, so come back tomorrow and hopefully I'll have pictures up of our entire family's first Christmas tree! Oh, and it's snowing right now (and sticking!) so maybe Daddy will have to shovel tomorrow with a Baby Bjorn on (just kidding).

Unconditional Love

I found out a few nights ago that one of my best friends is dealing with a family medical issue, and I found out a few moments ago that another best friend is dealing with one as well. One of them has a dad who is battling something, and unfortunately, it's unclear what that something is at this point. The other has a son who is undergoing emergency surgery tonight to hopefully clear up a condition. They are two different situations for my friends, and they have two different perspectives, but I'm sure they both feel the same way.

Since becoming a Dad myself, things like this tug on my heart strings a little bit harder. Whether it be a dirty diaper, overtiredness, hunger, or just gas, each cry goes straight to my heart and makes me want to help her in any way I can. Anything that might be hurting Kaylani makes me a little bit sad. I can only imagine what my friends are going through themselves, because it's far more serious that anything I've experienced with her so far. Kaylani has only been in my life for less than a month, and as we grow older together, it will be tougher and tougher to see her go through any times of pain.

Having a baby has made me realize that you cannot take life for granted. You have to enjoy every moment that you are given, and should always feel like you are blessed. I truly believe that everything happens for a reason, and because of that, I thank God every night for the wonderful life I've led, and will lead. I ask that He continues to watch over me and my family, my friends, my relatives, and all those in need, and tonight is no different. God bless each and every one of you, but especially my friends who need it the most right now.

To two of my best friends: You and your families are in my prayers, and I wish nothing but the best to each of you in the near future.

Go ahead and shoot! I dare you!

We've had friends tell us to get professional photos done while Kaylani is still really young. "It's easier now" is what they say. So I figured, if it's easier, why don't we do it ourselves? I have a camera. I have a baby. I have a blanket that looks nice, and I even have a Christmas tree (okay, it's a tiny fiberoptic tree that we used when we lived in Florida, but it'll do until we get our first real tree this year). Well let me tell you, it's not easier. It's a lie.

We took over 100 pictures yesterday, trying to get Kaylani in a cute enough picture to put on a Christmas card. That doesn't even include us in the pictures since just trying to get her to look cute for us was hard enough! What's funny is that almost any other time, she'll lay there, and just stare straight ahead for a picture. Sometimes she'll even smile (or have gas) for the camera, and all is good. But put her in a Christmas outfit and tell her we need to get these shots in, and everything goes out the window.

Not only did she wake up, but she cried, she opened her eyes real wide (yes, the obvious "wide half-Asian eyes" jokes are being purposely left out of this blog), and she did some weird things with her hands and arms. Speaking of which, doesn't she look like she's giving some sort of "W" with her right hand in the picture above? I think she must know her Daddy's from West Caldwell and that's what we used to do back when we were "cool."

Anyways, since you've taken the time to come here, it's only fair for me to post the outtakes from our photo session (along with some other normal pictures from the last 2 days). Enjoy the cute outfits, the funny faces, and the wonderful backgrounds at Studio Tam! Oh, and by the way, I've now added captions to the latest pictures and will try and do so going forward. I figured I should have some of the essence from the original JonTam.com in here!

If these exist, I want them. If they don't, make them!

Registering at Babies R Us before Kaylani was born was a fun event, as any registry building event usually is. What's not to love about walking around a store with a laser scanner and pointing it at each and every thing in the store in case your friends and family decide to get carried away and buy it all.


All in all, we got most of everything we asked for, and definitely got all the necessities to get us started. And anything we didn't get, we purchased ourselves shortly after the baby shower. To date, I think the most useful thing we have is the bottle warmer (at least to me it is). Sure I could have said car seat, or crib, or pack and play, maybe even the great books, or even the bottle of whiskey we drank at the shower, but it's the Avent iQ Bottle Warmer that tops my list.


Yes, it's completely unnecessary and does the same thing as boiling some water or running the bottle under hot water for a few minutes, but the fact that I can put a refrigerated bottle of breastmilk in this machine, turn it on, go change Kaylani, use the bathroom, even check my email, all while this is heating to the exact temperature that I need it to be, and have it work between the hours of 1 and 3am, make it the most useful gadget we have.


Our friends Rob and Jen (Sofie's parents) recently told me their baby tub has a shower head attachment, which sure beats the plastic cups that we've been using over here during bath time. Well, that got me thinking: what other gadgets could there, or should there, be to make life with a baby easier? Here's some thoughts that I've had:

-A baby cry interpreter. I think they actually have these but there's no way they could work. I know they had one on the Simpsons at least...

-A car seat swinger. Babies like to be swung back and forth in their car seat, so there should be a machine you could hang a car seat from and it would swing for you. It'd almost be like an infant swing, but also be a car seat.

-A baby feeder. No, I'm not thinking something like the automatic pet food dispensers, but if there could be something you could sit her in (before she can sit herself), and then have it hold the bottle at the right angle and even know when to stop, that'd be nice. As a companion product, that leads me to...

-A burper. I don't know what this would look like, but I do know that patting her on the back for up to 10 minutes gets kinda tiring.

-An auto swaddler. They make the SwaddleMe, or MiracleWrap blankets that have the right dimensions and velcro to make things easier, but they don't work as well as an old fashioned swaddle in a 3'x3' blanket. If I could put Kaylani in the middle of a blanket and have her be swaddled right away, man, I'd get a second job to afford that (as long as the second job required no more than 1 hour of work a week).

-A parent swayer. This is my golden idea, and one that I've been dreaming about for as long as I can remember (my memory only goes back 3 days now by the way). There should be something that I can stand in, and it would sway me side to side. I picture it as a tall bar stool, but not a full seat so I'm still kinda standing, and it's able to completely hold me up. Then, it moves side to side (or front to back depending on preference). It also has something that wraps around me and Kaylani so that I don't have to support her myself (maybe a solid arm rest would do). This way, I can essentially sleep while standing up, and Kaylani could sleep in my arms. Wow. Anyone who invents this would be a millionaire. I'm telling you, it would sell. And I'm also telling you that if you invent it and become a millionaire, I want money. And I want it to play La Cucaracha when I honk the horn. Oh wait, that's Homer's invention. Nevermind.

Alright, well that's my list for now. It also doubles as my Christmas wish list, so if you run across any of these items and feel like you want to buy a new dad a present, I'm more than willing to accept them. Thanks in advance!

Bjorn Free!

You can clearly see that we've broken out the Baby Bjorn and tried it out. First reaction: it's pretty awesome! Mommy was able to use it to carry Kaylani around and still get some stuff done. Plus, it makes for some pretty cool pictures!

I got my first experience with the Baby Bjorn when we went to the supermarket. First of all, this thing is not as easy to put on as it may seem. There are crossing straps, and buckles, and they all have to be undone to put it on (unless you slip it on over your head...but I'm just not that flexible). Well it was pretty cold out, so instead of fussing with the Baby Bjorn in a parking lot, I decided I'll put it on at home first. So yes, I put on the Baby Bjorn, put a jacket over it, and hopped in the car.

Driving around with a Baby Bjorn on is kind of an odd experience. It reminds me of my childhood when you could see people driving with their babies on their lap, or nowadays when people drive with their dog on their lap. Sure it's a bit different since I didn't actually have anything in my Baby Bjorn, but that's what I felt like.

Either way, I'm not complaining about putting it on at home. I think it was by far the most convenient way to handle the cold. I had Kaylani out of her car seat and into the Baby Bjorn within seconds, and then zipped my coat around her as we headed into the store. If I chose to look normal instead of looking ridiculous, I would have had to stand outside the car fussing with it for a good 2-3 minutes. That's valuable time when it's cold out!

Anyways, I'm kind of excited to use it again, although I do lean forward every few minutes to make sure she can breathe. Every time I look down she looks like her nose is flattened against my chest (which it is). How could she possible breathe well? Forget that, how could she sleep under those conditions? Well whatever Baby Bjorn's tricks are, they work, and that's all I can say.

And if you'd like, check out a few more pictures of Kaylani in the Baby Bjorn, as well as some others with her friend Sofie!

Count Her Out!

Ever since Kaylani was born she has reminded me of different things from my days of watching wrestling. Of course there was the wrestling match incident from 3 weeks back, but lately, there have been a couple of more. The first reminds me of some old school sleeper holds.

I'll try and be a bit descriptive since I'm sure not many of you watched as much wrestling as I did, but there's this move called "the sleeper hold." Okay, I'm sure there were some fancy names to it (like "The Camel Clutch"), but the generic sleeper hold is what comes to mind. In wrestling, one person is basically using their arm as a vice to hold the person's head. Then, the person usually "falls asleep" (passes out), and if they don't wake up, they lose the match. Well in order to check if they're awake, the ref picks up their arm high in the air, then lets it drop. They do this 3 times, and usually, without fail, on the third try, the arm will stay high up in the air (typically in a fist), shake a little bit to get the crowd going, and then the comeback would be on.

Well Kaylani does something similar. No, I don't put her head in a vice-like grip to get her to fall asleep (I might if the swaying didn't work...just kidding). But, every time she falls asleep, I test her sleep level by picking up her arm and letting it drop. If it drops straight down, I do it again for good measure. And even after it drops straight down for the second time, I can't resist a third try. I think I only do it because that's what they do in wrestling, and if you get that third drop, then you know you can count them out.

I'd say the arm drops straight down for the third straight time about 50% of the time. And when it does, she gets put right into a swaddle hold (swaddle hold sounds like a wrestling term right?) and she's usually fast asleep. But when the arm doesn't drop...when it stays up in the air...that's when we know we're in for a comeback. When she holds her arm straight up I feel like she's shaking it at me, getting all her stuffed animals riled up for a comeback, and it works. The momentum shifts and I have to retreat. I have to go back to the swaying, back to the shushing, sometimes even run off crying to Mommy.

When she's really riled up, she'll even start throwing around headbutts. She'll flail around aimlessly (or what I think is aimlessly), but really I think she's just headbutting me. Headbutts were always a crowdpleaser too because you never expect it. Man, this girl's good.

Anyways, Mommy thinks Kaylani might be out for the count right now, so it's time for the ref (or Daddy) to check her out. Let's just hope that third time is a charm...otherwise, we're in for a long match.