That's just the way it is

It's finally Friday. Not only does that mean the week is finally over, but it also means it's time for another round of Fatherhood Fridays over at Dad-Blogs. Don't forget to check out the great posts over there...but not until you're done here of course. Don't worry, you'll be done soon, because I'm pretty done myself.

It's been one heck of a week over here. 5 long days filled with back to back to back to back to back meetings, which left actual work to be done in the few minutes in between, or late at night. Add on 5 long days of teething and you get one heck of a week over here. Did I say that already? By all definitions, this would be considered a bad week. Long work days mean shorter time with Kaylani. Long, sleepless nights mean less energy to handle a long work day. As a one off, not so bad. But when repeated for an entire week it starts to wear on you.

I'm actually not even going to complain about the number of meetings or the amount of work I had (and still have) because in this economy, any work is good work. The worst part of all of this is that it's taking away from the time I spend with Kaylani, and also the way I spend my time with Kaylani. Instead of relaxing and having a great time, I spend an occasional hour in the morning with her, which is usually just me talking to her while I get ready to leave. Then, by the time I get home it's usually holding her for a few minutes before she has to get up to bed and get some sleep. And after a few more hours of work, it's off to bed for Mommy and Daddy so we can get up in a few hours to start it all over again.

My ideal view on Fatherhood would be to spend quality time with Kaylani by playing with her, teaching her, loving her, and watching over her for as long as I can. Sure there are days that I wish I could spend all day with her (in addition to weekends) and do all of those things on a regular basis, but that's not something I can do. The other, less glamorous part of my journey into Fatherhood is to be a provider for both her and Mommy. And if having a lot of work means that I have a job, and having a job means that Kaylani is taken good care of by Mommy, then that's a part of Fatherhood that I'm willing to accept.

So while going to work and spending less time with Kaylani isn't ideal for me, that's just the way it is. I still wouldn't trade my version of Fatherhood for anything in the world. Well, maybe a foolproof get rich scheme or a lottery jackpot, but that would only change the working part of Fatherhood. I'd still find the time to play with her, teach her, love her, and watch over her. Hmm, maybe I should play the lotter. Hey, you never know. All it takes is a dollar and a dream, right?

We've only just begun

A few days ago I asked for tooth number 2 to come in so we could be done with this phase of teething. It's been one week since tooth number 1 came out, but months of anticipation. Over the past few nights, she's been sleeping better. Not great. Just better. Instead of waking up every 2-4 hours, she's been lasting closer to 6 hours. And what keeps us running (barely, but running) is that we've been going to bed the same time as she has. So Kaylani's in bed at 8pm? Well then we'll be in bed and hopefully asleep by 9pm. It's pretty lame, but it works. And we figured it'd only be a short term routine anyways.

Today, Kaylani's 2nd tooth finally came in. It listened to our calls and poked its way on out. And since teeth come in twos, that means we're in the clear and Kaylani will go back to her regularly scheduled 9-11 hour sleep shifts. More importantly, Mommy and Daddy could go back to their regularly scheduled 8 hours of sleep, and still have time to stay up a little later and get some stuff done (and boy does Daddy need a few extra hours to get stuff/work done). But then we found out that we've only just begun.

Right next to Kaylani's 2nd tooth we can see our dreams of extra hours in the day and normal hours of sleep disappearing faster than the gums holding in Kaylani's 3rd tooth. A 3rd tooth? Seriously? Now? I really thought teeth came in two's and then took a break for awhile. A 3rd tooth on the horizon means more moving, more teething, more pain, and unfortunately, not more sleep. Sleep is something we all need to keep going. For Kaylani and Mommy, sleep makes them able to play all day, nap at reasonable times, and not be fussy. For Daddy, sleep means that I'm able to keep my head in the game during 10 straight hours of meetings and still be able to play with Kaylani for a few hours before getting actual work done at night. Sleep means so much to all of us, but we've only just begun.

Teething means Kaylani is growing which is great. I'm sure I'll echo this sentiment for many years to come, if not for the rest of my life, but sometimes I wish that Kaylani would just grow a little bit slower. I wish she would develop faster, but grow slower. Does that make any sense? I wouldn't be surprised if it didn't. I spend working hours ensuring that I make sense. Sleep would help me make sense all the time. Too bad we've only just begun.

Spanish in 4 months

In case you didn't notice from the picture, today is Kaylani's 8 month birthday! Even though Independence Day just passed, we figured we were close enough to get some extra use out of her All-American Swimsuit, and Mommy made a very patriotic sign to go along with it. With all this American activity going on around her, you'd think Kaylani would play along. Instead, she showed off her Spanish side.

Kaylani is half Puerto Rican, and 8 months old, which makes her 4 Spanish months old (Asian math for you). Apparently, 4 months is what it takes before you can pick up a little bit of Spanish (or 4 years if you're Daddy). But the little bit of Spanish that Kaylani picked up is arguably the most difficult. Today, she spouted off a clean, crisp, long trill of her tongue. As some of you might know, not everyone can do this. It's quite difficult and I'm pretty impressed with her early Spanish speaking skills. I mean, she hasn't even watched Dora or Diego yet!

Rolling her R's is impressive in my book because I'm not a native Spanish speaker (I'm not any type of Spanish speaker actually). It's probably harder to do than something like asking your girlfriend's mother (who only speaks Spanish) for her daughter's hand in marriage in Spanish. It's probably even harder than trying to think of something else to say in Spanish when you get back "only her hand???" as the reply. And since I'm already off topic and reliving my own nerve-racking experience of talking to my now Mother-in-law (who, by the way, I replied to with "no no, all of her body" in perfect, yet awkward, Spanish), I might as well just throw it out there that I expect Kaylani's future suitor to ask for my permission in perfect Spanish. AND, if he says something like "no no, all of her body," he better be a damn quick runner because I'm not going to laugh like Abuela did.

Anyways, we always have reason to celebrate something during Kaylani's monthly birthday. Sure we wish it was crawling, or standing, or something else, but we'll take it. Speaking Spanish is a great milestone, even if she doesn't mean it or know what she's doing. Maybe next month she'll spout out some full Spanish sentences. I hope not though, because if she's speaking Spanish before I do, then I'm sure going to get a lot of grief from my in-laws. I better get to work just in case. Feliz Cumpleanos Kaylani! Yo quiero Taco Bell (and other Spanish stuff)!

Oh, and don't forget to check out pictures from the last couple of days, including a few from Gymboree, and more birthday pictures! Enjoy!

Riding off into the sunset

Every night, we try and do quiet activities before bedtime. Whether it's a song, a book, or maybe even listening to a prayer from a doll that Titi Mayra Lee bought us, it's always something to relax Kaylani just a little bit. Then, she'll nurse for 30-40 minutes with Mommy and go quietly off to sleep. It's a good routine and it's been working well for us, but it just didn't have that Western flair to it.

At the end of old Western movies, the hero would ride off into the sunset on their trusted horse. The music would fade out, the picture would fade out, and a happy ending would be had by all as the movie and the story concluded. It all seemed so nice that I thought I would replicate something to that effect for Kaylani's bedtime routine.

Tonight, we decided to mix it up a bit and ride off into the sunset with Kaylani. I think it went pretty well since she's nice and tired now so maybe we'll keep this new routine up. Or maybe we should go back to our old song/book/prayer routine. What do you think?

Show yourself!

I know you're in there. One of your little buddies already gave you guys away. For months you've been tormenting us, but we've been on to you. You've left us little clues and tried to hide and make us look like we're crazy, but we know we're not. Just give up and come out. If you do, we promise not to be too hard on you. We'll even take care of you. We'll treat you like one of our own. If you do it, so will everyone else. Soon, your other friends will come out too. Before you know it, all 20 of you will show yourselves so you might as well just follow suit. You won't even be the first one anymore, so just do it.

Will Tylenol help? We'll give you Tylenol before Kaylani goes to bed tonight so maybe you won't bother her later. If you're not going to come out, just relax okay? No need to move around if you're just messing around. I mean, if you want to go, then go big. Go all the way, but none of this behind the scenes stuff. It's totally not cool. It's also not the right thing to do, so stop it. Please?

Alright, I'm serious now. Get out. Stop messing around and just come out. You're keeping us up at night now. If I have to listen to Kaylani scream at the top of her lungs after 4 hours for the 4th straight night, I'm not going to be very happy with you. Your buddy made a plea bargain and came out a few days ago so I can't blame him anymore. He ratted you guys out. And I can see you! I mean, not really, but you might as well be out. So just cut it out and let's be done with this. We're all tired of this little act. Especially Kaylani.

O-U-T OUT! OUT OUT OUT! Don't make me come in there and get you! You're lucky that you're protected, but you won't be for long. If you don't come out, I'm going to make sure you get taken care of when you do...and not just once or twice a day...but 3 times a day! That's right, I'll make Kaylani be one of those people. 3 times a day. You want that? I didn't think so. So just give up and come out now.

Okay, you win. I'm done negotiating with you now. Just please don't wake Kaylani up after a few hours. Let Kaylani sleep for her normal 10 hours because we can't take much more of this. We can try again tomorrow. I'll even make sure Mommy gives you lots of things to play with all day. Lots of cold things to hang out with. Do we have a deal? I don't want to be having this same conversation for 2 hours in the middle of the night. We all need to rest, so let's do it. You hang out quietly, and tomorrow you can come on out and we'll call a truce. Sound good? Great!

Looks like I'm the one getting brushed off now. Damn teeth. They'll pay for that.

Finishing off the Fourth

This weekend has been a long weekend, and I don't just mean because I had Friday off. Fourth of July lasted far longer than just one day, and today, we officially closed out the Fourth with one last BBQ. This time, we had it at home with a few of our friends. And if you know anything about Tam's, it's that we like to go big or go home...except we're already at home.

Okay, we didn't actually go that big, but we did have a lot of fun. Kaylani, Sofie, and Aidan had a grand time in the baby pool, while Darby and Sloan played in the bigger pirate ship pool. We grilled, drank beers, ate cake, pie, and more all throughout the day. We even got a visit from Mia too and all the kids played together in the yard. And all in all, I'd say the kids (and their parents) had a great time!

I'm actually so spent that I can't even do the day justice. In fact, Kaylani doesn't have the energy to cry tonight (yet). She had such a good time that she passed out and stayed down after only nursing for 10 minutes. So instead of trying to describe the great time we've had this Fourth of July holiday, here are a few pictures from today, and a ton of pictures from yesterday (it's much easier to take pictures when you're not grilling). Be back tomorrow in full force!

Past, Present, and Future

Today we took a ride in our time machine. Throughout the day we had a look at the past, spent some time in the present, and even got a glimpse into the future. And I have to say, all three look pretty good to me!

It started off with a trip to the Princeton Battlefield. We walked across a long field that General George Washington did so himself, but we did it with much less conflict. I'd elaborate a bit more, but frankly, I don't really know. If you're interested in that kind of stuff, feel free to visit their site). At one end of the long field, we visited the past where an old preserved house stood showing items from over 200 years ago. There were men dressed up in old clothing, firing cannons, and even reading the Declaration of Independence to commemorate that same act 223 years ago. Of course, Kaylani wasn't remotely interested in any of this so we just sat nearby, had her lunch, then took a few pictures with a recently fired cannon.

After that, we went back to the present in the form of Downtown Princeton. There, Mommy and Daddy grabbed some food and we all sat down in Palmer Square to enjoy a live band for us. Kaylani hung out on her blanket, sat, fell down, and reached for everything she could get her little hands on before it was time to go. With the weather finally cooperating and us finally having some free time, we thoroughly enjoyed our first time hanging out in a park as a family.

For dinner, the Harrison's were gracious enough to have us over for an impromptu BBQ, and that's where we got our glimpse into the future. Sloan, who is 23 months old, and Darby, who is 4.5 years old, ran around doing various things that we're looking forward to Kaylani mimicking in a few years. From advanced activities like zip lines and rope swings down to water tables and baby pools, we watched as the girls ran from one thing to the next, including Kaylani.

Sometimes it's hard to believe that Kaylani will be old enough to do things like that in the not to distant future. As we sit back and wait for Kaylani to start crawling, it comes with the fact that once she crawls, she'll be walking, running, then zip-lining in no time at all. A glimpse of the future is all it takes to step back and enjoy Kaylani for what she is now. Tonight, she even clapped on her own for the very first time. She's all growed up and we don't even know it. America is another year older today, but to us, Kaylani is still just our little girl, no matter how big she may be. And we're going to enjoy every minute of it. Happy Independence Day!

Fireworks Go Boom!

Daddy's never been a big fireworks guy. He never bought illegal fireworks and set them off in the backyard or at the park when he was kid. He never looked forward to the big fireworks show every year. Never even went down to the Charles River for the big Boston Pops Fireworks Spectacular in all the years he lived in Boston. He wasn't afraid of them and didn't dislike them. Just never made it a priority to go.

Mommy, on the other hand, loves fireworks. For Mommy, watching the fireworks with her family, a group of friends, or even 10,000 strangers was meaningful to her. There was something about everyone being together that just touches her deep inside and makes her happy (and cry...tears of joy). So since this was our first year as a larger family, we headed into downtown Princeton yesterday to watch the local show. I'm glad we did.

We met up with Danika, Darby, and Sloan in the fields next to Palmer Stadium and parked ourselves on a blanket sometime before 9pm. We were a little bit worried about sitting on the grass because of Kaylani's still present deep hatred of grass, but apparently the blanket was a safe enough barrier for her. We were also a bit worried that we were out watching fireworks past 9pm instead of having Kaylani home sleeping (or crying herself to sleep) like we normally do by that time. But once the fireworks started, Kaylani was mezmorized. She didn't make a single peep during the whole 20 minute show.

Each time a firework would shoot up into the air, she would follow it up. It was absolutely precious to watch her eyes light up with excitement as she watched each boom unfold. While she waited for the next one, she would look around at all the other people (or play/chew on the glow stick Sloan let her have). But as soon as she heard that tell-tale boom, her eyes darted straight back into the sky to check out the latest color and pattern.

I'm very glad that Mommy talked me into keeping Kaylani up past her bedtime to watch our first fireworks show. I'm even glader that Kaylani didn't mind the noise or the lights. And even though she only slept 5 hours last night and only took one very long and overdue nap at 3pm today, I'm still glad because I think Kaylani really liked it. Looks like we found ourselves a new family tradition, which is something I'll never get tired of starting. When it all comes down to it, it's all about family.

And because it was such a memorable occasion, you know I had the camera at the ready. Check out the latest pictures of Kaylani and the fireworks, and also some of her new Amish doll from Titi Briseida, and of her and Mia from a BBQ today at Steph and Harold's! Enjoy, and Happy Independence Day!

Kaylani's First Tooth!

Kaylani's been acting up for the last couple of days. She hasn't been eating well, she hasn't been nursing well, and she definitely hasn't been napping or sleeping well. We thought that maybe we had screwed her up with all our travel plans and general craziness over the last couple of weeks. We thought maybe she was getting a little cold and fussy because of it. We thought maybe she was even teething, but then again, we've been thinking that for 4 months. Turns out that this time we were finally right about the teething.

Daddy got a text message from Mommy today saying "Good news! Can't wait 2 tell u. Stupid mtg of urs!" And since Daddy was in his "stupid mtg" I didn't get news of Mommy's discovery of her first tooth until an hour later. Finally we could celebrate her first tooth (for real, unlike 3 months ago on April Fools' Day)! But the way Mommy discovered the tooth wasn't exactly the most pleasant.

Apparently nursing and teeth don't mix well. We've heard stories from friends who have nursed babies with teeth and barely lived to tell about it. And now that Kaylani has a tooth, Mommy came clean and said she was secretly hoping Kaylani wouldn't have a tooth anytime soon. For the last few days, Mommy's been saying that Kaylani's not doing something right, or something is different, but there was never anything we could pinpoint. Today though, it became clear as day and when she checked, there it was!

When I got home to see the tooth, it took me 5 minutes to get Kaylani to stop trying to lick my finger so I could just see her tooth. And since we're being honest, I was kinda disappointed when I finally saw it. For some reason I was expecting like a real little person tooth to just be hanging out there, like those cartoon pictures of a baby with 2 or 3 curly hairs, and 1 or 2 teeth just hanging out in their wide open mouth. Instead, I saw the very tip of a tooth poking out through her gums. Still exciting, but just not up to my unrealistic expectations I guess. Silly Daddy.

So Kaylani has her first tooth, and she's not afraid to use it either. She chomped down (or up I guess since it's her bottom tooth) on me and it definitely felt like a tooth. My favorite is to tell Mommy that she has no idea what that feels like, but then I just look away when I get the dirty stare back from her. Apparently nursing moms don't find teeth funny. Anyways, we're very excited that Kaylani is all growed up again with her first real tooth. Soon the rest will come filing in, but until then, we'll celebrate this one and start to take care of it. The tricky part will be seeing how Mommy handles it!

And since it's Thursday/Friday, don't forget to check out Dad-Blogs for the latest Fatherhood Friday! I can't wait to spend the first part of my July 4th holiday reading up on all the other great posts over there, so you should too. Enjoy and Happy 4th and Fatherhood Friday!

Failed Night Out

With Abuela in town for only a few more nights, we planned on taking advantage by sneaking out for a dinner alone. No highchair, no stroller, no variety of toys to distract Kaylani, and no having to move silverware away from her until finally giving in and letting her play with them. We had planned on heading to our favorite restaurant, Sotto in downtown Princeton, to celebrate Mommy's birthday a day late. We even had a plan for our plan that involved putting Kaylani down by 8pm so we could eat sometime before 9pm and be back well before 11pm. We planned on enjoying our dinner without having to look at a monitor or listen to see if Kaylani was crying. What we didn't have was a plan for when everything went differently from our plan.

I got home from work around 6:30pm which was during Kaylani's dinner time. Word on the street was she was being a bit fussy today, so after struggling to get Kaylani to eat all 4oz of her dinner tonight, it was time for bed. By 7:15pm, Mommy was ready to nurse Kaylani, and by 8pm, Kaylani was passed out and ready to be put into her crib. So far, our plan was going perfectly. But that's as far as we got. After 15 minutes, Daddy went in to check on Kaylani for the 2nd time. With a little bit of gentle forehead stroking, Kaylani was practically asleep, but not asleep enough to get out of the room without her making a stink out of it. Literally. Kaylani got so upset that she pooped.

Poop is the one thing that gets Daddy to give in and pick her up after she's been put down for the night. So after changing her and some gentle swaying, back into the crib she went. The crying commenced immediately, and after another 30 minutes and 2 trips in, things were looking grim for our hopes at dinner. At 9pm, Daddy went in for the 5th time tonight and tried to calm her down so she would fall asleep. And just like the other 4 times, she would quiet down, close her eyes, and try and get comfortable as long as Daddy had a hand on her. But once the hand disappeared, the crying came back.

At 9:15pm, Mommy and Daddy pulled the plug on our night out. Besides the fact that Kaylani still wasn't asleep, it was also too late for us to go out because we're old and lame. Instead, we headed down to the kitchen to heat up some leftovers and settle in for our nice dinner "alone" in the kitchen while staring at the monitor and listening to Kaylani cry, just like every other night. And wouldn't you know it, as soon as we sat down to take our first bite of food, Kaylani fell asleep. Just like we planned.

I'm convinced Kaylani knew we were trying to go out. As calming and reassuring to her as I tried to be to get her to sleep, apparently she saw right through me. She cried for 1.5 hours, and kept staring at the door and the monitor to make sure we knew she was looking for us. She calmed down only when I was there, and cried all the way until we sat down for our dinner. She knew. She had to. Why else would she have been crying?

Anyways, we're planning on trying again tomorrow night. One thought is to put her in her crib by 7pm, but knowing our luck, she'll pass out right away and wake up at 4am like she did 2 days ago. Hopefully tomorrow night will go better. If not, tomorrow will just be failed night out #2.